Hola, amigos. I know it’s been a long time since I rapped at ya, but I been busy kicking ass and taking names. And it’s surprisingly hard to get people to give you their names after you kick their ass. They tend to run and to try and hide. Plus they’re all sobbing and it makes them hard to understand. So finding them and getting their names is a lot of work. Almost enough to make me stop maintaining my “List of Names of People Whose Asses I’ve Kicked.” But I’m not one to give up in a project mid-way through. Except sometimes, like if the project is really hard, or really boring, or I decide I don’t want to do it anymore. But that’s different.

Anywho, I know none of you could sleep without knowing exactly what I’ve been up to lately so I figured I’d fill you in. Here’s a brief run down.

For one thing, I did my comedy act at my IWW branch’s annual dinner last weekend. I was real nervous. Here’s why.
1) My act is often deliberately, dare I say aggressively, unfunny. That’s part of the point. So inflicting that on people I like was a bit nervewracking, cuz I figured they would (rightly) think I thought it was like regular funny, not unfunny funny. That sort of misunderstanding is part of what I think is funny about doing the act, but it’s only funny when it’s strangers thinking I’m a dolt, not people I know and like.
2) I always get nervous speaking in front of people, even though I do it a lot. I get especially nervouser the more I rate the people in the audience (except like my closest people, whose esteem I have fully won via jedi mind tricks)
3) I forgot I was even supposed to the act until the last minute. At 4:30 I remembered that Jeff was picking me up at 5:30. (I was going to take the bus.) At 5:00 I walked my dog and checked my voicemail (Mr. Multi-Tasker, me) and had a message reminding me I had agreed by email to do this and that I should take 10-15 minutes. I hadn’t actually thought I’d agreed. I thought I’d said “sure, I’d be willing to do that if you want, let me know.” So I got home, grabbed my lap top and my notebook and some notecards and set about preparing.

I wrote everything on 3×5 cards. It worked really well. The note cards I mean. I think I’m going to start doing everything on note cards. That act worked okay too. Worked extra well cuz I had my second best hat and my comedy shirt on. People were nice about it, so yeah it worked I guess.

Il mio Accomplishmientio numero due: this one’s a two-fer. I went bouldering three times this week. That’s sort of stupid cuz over-bouldering is how I hurt my arm a while back, but I figure some accomplishments are stupid. See the Guiness Book of World Records for instance. So the stupidness doesn’t mean it’s not an accomplisment. I only went the third time cuz my brother asked me to go with him. See my second trip was his first this week and his first trip to that particular wall. (He’s a lot better than me at it.) So the next day he said “can you help me figure out one of those routes?” I said sure. And so I climbed too. And here’s the main sub-complishment in this one: I got to the top on a new route, and started just sort of climbing around. I’m still not good at climbing, but I’m definitely improving and having more fun with it.

Accomplishment tree is also a sort of double accomplishment, or maybe even a three-fer: I hosted a dinner to thank the people who helped us move back in August. Very late I know but we’d had this bat living in our front room so we didn’t want to have company. Still, late repayment is still repayment so, one subaccomplishment accomplished in the course of accomplishing this over all accomplishment. And I cleaned most of the apartment (some of it was clean already and bits of it that weren’t clean I just sort of covered up). I spent pretty much all day Friday on that. It went from wreck-we-can’t-have-people-in to decently clean and organized looking apartment. And I made a nice lasagna and big old salad for five.

Accomplishment four is the top of the pops here as far as I’m concerned, like not only the top of the week but like a milestone kind of accomplishment, a new level reached. Like a second piece of the tri-force recovered, or learning to lift rock with my mind while standing on my head. I cleaned the apartment again and did a TON of cooking, like several hours two days in a row, thus successfully hosting a Thanksgiving dinner for 8, count ’em, 8 people. Including my father in law, my dad, and my brother that doesn’t live with me. Plus my wife and the brother who lives with me, of course, and two friends. So a Thanksgiving FAMILY dinner. It was the first time I hosted a holiday family thing, people trekking here instead of me trekking to one. And the food was good. My wife made a home-made pumpkin pie (entirely from scratch, was de-lish, so I’m not the only accomplished member of the household). I made two massive bowls of sweet potatoes, regular mashed potatoes, an onion based vegetarian gravy that turned out stellar if I do say so myself (my dad liked it and he’s not a vegetarian), stuffing, acorn squash, and two kinds of baked tofu. Rory brought a wild rice risotto and my father in law brought home made cranberry stuff, both which added a nice touch. The leftovers are awesome, and there aren’t as many as I thought – cuz people at a lot, cuz my food was so good. Hip hip…! Yes! That’s what I say. Big ups the me massive. Best of all, the icing on the cake so to speak, the food was done on time. Plus even though it was loads of work I think hosting is less work than traveling for a million hours on the bus to someone else’s place. People can come see me from now on. What has two thumbs and ain’t traveling for the holidays no more? This guy! At least until christmas.

And now back to work. Ugh.