I get self-inhibiting sometimes. I periodically have thoughts like “I want to learn more about this subject!” then I let doubts and so on get in the way. (It’s likely that my occasional flitting from interest to interest is a bad habit as well but I’m not going to follow that line of thinking right now.) Among other things, I get shy about this blog. I’m shy about it in various ways, including feeling funny when people I know in my offline life find it, because it’s all so unfinished. It’s a bit like doodling in the margins of a notebook and having someone look at the drawings and go “huh. I could sorta see that, I guess.” This was easier when no one read my blog (as opposed to now, when almost no one read my blog) and I was more strictly anonymous, as I could write about stuff with a sense of impunity. Of course I’ve learned a ton from discussion with other people and remain grateful for the lovely people I’ve corresponded with via the blog, I don’t mean to suggest otherwise. It’s just that I get self-conscious. This is self-inhibiting in part because I generally don’t know what I think until I think my way there. If there’s stuff I Want to think through it’s good for me to write about it, and if I don’t do so I will generally have much less lower quality views on the subject. I also periodically think “I’d like to try to write a record review, and a short story” and similar stuff, and that makes me feel Rather Vulnerable and as I’ve felt Slightly More Exposed on ye olde blogge I’ve become more skittish about being vulnerable here. Which, again, is self-inhibiting, as the blog helps me think. And it’s self-contradictory because I could just write, you know, privately, on my computer, or in private posts that no one else can see, but I find that less motivating than blogging. I like the chance to talk w/ some folk about my stuff, the potential for readers is fun and motivating, even though it’s that very thing that makes me nervouser. Silly. Gotta get over this. Perhaps I need more of an attitude about stuff. “Fuck you, I owe you neither quality nor coherence nor being interesting so fuck you again!” (Perhaps I’ll write something called “The Courage To Bore: On Not Caring About Reader Interest” and “The Will to Confuse: Why Coherent Complete Thoughts Are Un-”) I dunno.

I need to get to bed now but before I do, among the things I’ve wanted to work on: the craft of writing. Writing better, not just more. I’m pretty good at quantity, at least when I put my mind to it, though I’d like to get more disciplined about the pace and regularity with which I write. But I’d also like to be better at the craft side of it all, and to have an analytical grasp as well (currently I’m like “uh, I like it, it’s… good, because reasons” much more than I’m like “ah, this piece of writing, with its short staccato sentences, numerous military metaphors, and somethingsomething meter…”). On that note, I thought I’d try this: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/exercises/6/9/24/

My answers are below. (I just had the thought that someone might make a joke revising sentences in a way that really changes their content, and maybe starts to build toward a story.)

Most students who spend time in Bradley Hall seldom pay attention to the building’s architecture.
He dropped out school to help support his family.
The bus company will probably announce the new schedule in a few days.
Domestic students have many opportunities to meet foreign students.
Most people have told a lie.
Breaking safety rules causes trouble for everyone.
Police arrested five students at a thousand-strong unpermitted rally.
Students prefer subjects they can use after graduation.
Freshmen need to recognize the importance of meeting with their adviser to discuss choosing a major.
As an aerospace technology company with an enviable record for stability, our company offers excellent professional growth opportunities.
Opinions vary on capital punishment.